We Are Needy

In this message series art, there is a bag of food. I’m sure you are wondering why. What does food have to do with trust?

There is a designed dependency on food that we all have in order to not just survive but to thrive! The same is true in our relationships. There is a designed dependency on trust in relationships. We need trust in our relationships to survive; but when there is high trust, we can thrive! Trust feeds relationships like food does a body.

JOURNAL: Do you recognize the dependency that our relationships have for trust? Would you say you have high levels of trust in your relationships?

Relationships depend on trust like our bodies depend on food, but the real question is who do we depend on to provide? If we were being honest, at times we would say we were white-knuckling, trying to take care of everything ourselves. Self-improving, striving, controlling (which I like to call “strategizing”) to convince myself it's okay. The good news is that we can confidently and surely place our trust in the Lord. He is a God that provides! It’s a steady kind of trust that is sure.

In Exodus 16:3-5 NLT, we see the Israelites have been delivered from Egypt and are on the journey to the Promise Land. “If only the Lord had killed us back in Egypt,” they moaned. “There we sat around, pots filled with meat and ate all the bread we wanted. But now you have brought us into this wilderness to starve us all to death.”

Then the Lord said to Moses, “Look, I’m going to rain down food from heaven for you. Each day, the people can go out and pick up as much food as they need for that day. I will test them in this to see whether or not they will follow my instructions. On the sixth day, they will gather food, and when they prepare it, there will be twice as much as usual.”

In relationships, the Lord wants for us to look to Him, not each other, to provide!

“You’re mad; let's talk about it” or “You’re sad; do you want a hug?” These are all statements I have made. I have a bad habit of telling people how they feel instead of asking. I don't know how someone feels. I can see signs and pick up on emotions, but I don't know really how they feel. Telling people how they feel doesn't build trust in a relationship; it fuels assumptions.

I know with my husband, Jim, the most frustrating thing is when I tell him how he feels, realize that is not helpful, apologize..only to do it again in 30 minutes! This doesn't build trust. But this habit takes time to work on, and I'm not perfect.

How do you really give your loved ones the grace to be and the room to become? Trust...but in God!  We all make mistakes; but if trust in our relationships is dependent on our performance, then we are going to be under a lot of pressure and our relationship is going to feel like a roller coaster ride.

Thankfully, Jim doesn't have to put his trust in my performance; he can trust the Lord with me. He trusts that the Lord is growing me, stretching me, speaking to me at His pace for me, not Jim's. All Jim has to trust is that my ear is to the Lord!

Have you ever been working an issue out with your spouse or friend, realized where you fell short, apologized, and then, to your dismay, do that exact same thing again a short time later? Does it send your relationship on a roller coaster ride?

If we look to the Lord to provide, then trust can safely offer those we are in relationship with the grace to be and the room to become. Now, that sounds like a recipe for thriving, trust-filled relationships!

JOURNAL: In relationships, are you placing your trust in a person or the Lord?

ACTIVATION: Write down an important relationship in your life. Maybe it's a parent, spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, or child. Then write down one thing that hurts trust in the relationships. Maybe there is a lack of reliability, dishonesty, or unhealthy communication. Take a minute to pray and resign from any job position that you have taken up! Maybe that is judge, teacher, or leader?

PRAYER: Lord, I come to You in humility and honesty. I come seeking Kingdom order and unity in the relationships in my life. I recognize the opportunities of growth in me and am thankful for the grace that is given to me by You and those that love me. Help me to also give those I love the grace to be and the room to become. I thank You that You are the one that convicts, teaches, and brings change! You are the only one who is able! I trust You with the relationships in my life and with me!
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